time with lucy

i am having so much fun during my afternoons alone with lucy! sometimes we nap, sometimes we shop, get errands done...whatever. it doesn't matter...we always have fun! she is a different kid when she is one on one and i am so grateful for this time with her! i will also be happy next year when they are all full day but i will live in the now....

yesterday we went outside because it was gorgeous out! i had plenty to do inside but i wanted to watch her play on the swings for awhile. i brought my people magazine out and sat to read but was freezing so i joined her in the sun...the lighting was perfect for some pix....here are some of them....is she photogenic (sp?) or what??? maybe i'm just partial.....

facebook

so it's my first full day without facebook and i feel a little sad and yet relieved that i don't know everyone's happenings for the day up to the minute detail of their lives. suddenly i have more time in the morning. the kids are watching their one tv show for the morning and soon i can pack lunches and get them ready. what cracks me up the most is everyone acting like this is such a big deal. i got so many phone calls and emails and texts wondering if i was okay!!! wow...facebook is such a part of our society now i guess that something MUST be wrong with me for me to want to cancel my account. FUNNY!!!!

hopefully next year when the kids are full day i'll get back into the world of facebook but for now, i need to focus on more important things....my life is too crazy this year to add one more thing to it.

i will update my blog as much as i can with pictures and just mundane things that happen around our house. like today lucy and i are heading to the pumpkin patch for her field trip. it should be a fun morning and then this afternoon i am heading to NJ to visit cassandra for the day!!! i can't wait to see her and i'm sure we'll have a fun dinner out together....not to mention the shopping beforehand.

even the littlest things...

last week in bible study i struggled to come up with a prayer request. i really wanted to come up with one because i didn't want to be prideful and say my life was perfect...it is far from that...well...not too far...i do love my life...but i wanted to find something that i am struggling with and share it with friends. so finally i came up with something. i find that i am getting grumpy with the driving to and from school all of the time. it's an easy drive but the fact that i have to drive it three times a day is wearing on me. so i shared that with my friends and went on my merry way to go pick up lucy (drive #2 of my day). i really want to have a joyful heart in all that i do and it was bugging me that i was getting so discouraged and complaining so much about that drive. i mean...it's my JOB! i want to be home with my kids...i want them to be at a christian school...what is my problem?????
later that week i found myself sitting in the end of the day car line having a few extra minutes to spare. i looked around and realized i forgot my book...but...i did have my bible and my workbook that had not made their way out of my car yet. i picked them up and managed to get three questions done and what do you know? i was suddenly in a better mood already! i did the same thing the next few days. my homework was fun to do and put me in a great spirit when those kids came running to the car.
it didn't hit me until about a day ago that this is exactly what i had asked for prayer about. suddenly i had chills when i realized that God is not too big for my little requests. He wanted me to be in the right spirit and He wanted me to be in His word....so of course...it's a win win! i am just always amazed at the way He works in my life and it certainly is a better place when i am open to what He has to teach me.

we survived

we did great during the first week of school!! the schedule with driving to and from three times a day is exhausting for me but i keep telling myself...it's just a year. next year they will all be full time and i'll probably long for these days having at least one of them home with me again. i got to have some alone time with lucy and some alone time with tucker this week. it was great. all three of them LOVE their new school. and i had to laugh when driving home tucker started singing "swing low sweet chariot." what a funny song for a little kid to sing. but he was belting it out in the back seat and loving the fact that he got to go to a chapel at school!
my sis and her family are here right now sleeping. i am sad that they are leaving today. we've had such a fun weekend and i know the kiddos have enjoyed seeing their cousins!!!
tomorrow we are back to the grind again....and i think the one lesson i have learned is to delegate some driving responsibilities to my hubby on the afternoons he is home.

i'm a nervous wreck!

here i am trying to calm the nerves of my soon to be third grader and i can't help but think...holy crap! they are in a new school...i don't know how to do the drop off or pick up or the dress code or the lunch rules. i don't know any of it!!!! (i know i will learn quickly but still) i'm also torn up about tucker being gone ALL DAY LONG! i can't believe this child is in kindergarten already. it is killing me. this afternoon i started crying into joe's shoulder to which he responded, "you and i are very different. i am excited for them to be gone!" the nerve!!!! then when i was putting tucker to bed tonight we were praying and i started to cry again! it seems like just yesterday i was bringing him home from the hospital...now i sound painfully old. thank goodness tomorrow i get to keep lucy home with me while the older two go off to full day school. ugh....i think we are both due to get a pedicure tomorrow...that will definitely make me feel better about all of this!

on a side note i am super excited for my sis, brother in law, and kiddos to come and invade our house this weekend. it will make for a really fun time and i'm sure we will all laugh a lot. i love seeing my kids get to play with their cousins!!! it's the best! can't wait to see you mandy!!!!!! i'm sure our husbands are dreading us being together....let the eye rolling begin!

amazingness to say the least

i love when suddenly you can see the whole big picture with God's hand blessing every part of your life for the last two years and you had know idea how it was happening. i mean, who am i to even question God's plan? but it's pretty cool when you see it laid out for you.

everyone knows our struggle with lucy...two years of testing and vomiting and headaches and no test showing a reason why. finally we got a diagnosis of the chiari malformation but we still weren't convinced it was causing her trouble. we weren't convinced we were making the right decision with the surgery and that she would be free from her symptoms. we trusted in the surgeon that said it needed to be taken care of and that it was a big one. soon after the surgery lucy started with her symptoms again. i didn't want to believe it but sure enough she was vomiting again. as if that wasn't frustrating enough, her doctors didn't seem to care to see her.

daisy and i had to take a trip to the dr the other night for her swimmers ear that was really bothering her. we were the last appointment of the night and we were an easy one. the doc could've come in checked her ears and left to go home to his family but instead he sat down to talk to me. he asked a couple of questions about lucy and came up with what i think is the exact diagnosis for her. something so simple...abdominal migraines. holy crap!!!!!!! seriously???? something that easy....

i am amazed that we had never seen this dr before the other night. i am amazed that we never got this simple diagnosis...and i truly believe that God wanted us to find lucy's chiari before we knew what was really wrong with her. she had to have that surgery...she had to be fixed before we could settle her symptoms of the migraines. that just amazes me more than i can say!!!! i just don't know how people can not believe in God when you clearly see His hand at work!

that all being said, i feel like the weight of the world has been lifted from my shoulders. i didn't realize how stressed i was about lu's health and the pain she was feeling every month. poor kid...all she needed was some tylenol and a dark room to sleep in...and maybe some meds but we are researching that now to come up with something to help her.

i love my kids and i love that God has entrusted them to me to take care of. it sure is humbling!

finally a weekend with "nothing" to do!

we had a great weekend! nothing was on our calendar so we just did things around the house, had some neighbors over for dinner, and visited some family! it was great!!! just what we needed before school starts next week. i am even excited looking at my calendar for this week as there is only one day that has something on it! i love it! i can seriously enjoy my kids for a whole week before they go back to school.
today i am making some phone calls to different doctors to see what we can do about lucy. she's had two more episodes of vomiting since her surgery. it's frustrating because we did the surgery hoping this would go away...but i can't think that way and i have to remember that she absolutely needed to have the surgery anyway. the doctors we are working with now don't seem too interested in seeing her again and i don't want to push her to do more testing at all...but to see her so miserable makes me think something is definitely wrong with her. i really don't know....
i was a little sad that i couldn't participate in ellen's run this year. it's a yearly fundraiser for breast cancer research that my whole family takes part in. i shouldn't say that i couldn't go...i just chose not to. like i said earlier...we had nothing to do this weekend and we really needed a weekend with no traveling. so i supported my fam and they had a very emotional and fun and exciting day yesterday. i'm so proud of all of them...they worked hard and raised money for a worthy cause!!!!
i'm really excited that joe has decided to lose 20 lbs with me! that will make it much easier for me too. he hit a weight that apparently upset him...he looks great to me but it's exciting to think he wants to be healthier...so no more sitting on the couch at night watching him snack! now we can both be eating fruit and veggies together! i love it!!!!!!!